Project 3 Outline

In this post I will construct an outline for Project 3, which is writing an argument on the controversy of designer babies in an op-ed.

Introduction (define or narrow the problem)

• Hook: When the term "designer babies" is thrown out in the news people automatically picture a glowing newborn baby with bright blue eyes. These type of articles regurgitate the common pro con arguments to the designer baby controversy. The supporters emphasize the possible medical breakthroughs that the technology of designer babies (gene editing) can create. The opponents argue that immorality and unknown risks outweigh the positives. 
• Transition: I am going to expand on the argument against designer babies and further convince my audience that designer babies are wrong and inspire them to act to prevent designer babies from becoming a reality. 
• Thesis: The high cost of designer babies will create societal conflicts because only an select group of wealthy people can afford it. Gene editing is immoral because it only serves to enhance traits and reproductive technology already exists to prevent genetic disease. 

Body Paragraphs

1. Major supporting arguments

• high cost of reproductive technology- in-vitro fertilization (IVF), pre-implantation genetic  diagnosis (PGD), and egg and sperm donors
• the gene editing technology of designer babies will cost a lot too like all of these reproductive technologies 
• don't need gene editing to prevent hereditable diseases, GDP can do this
• only the wealthy class can afford because costs are not covered by insurance companies
• separates upper and lower class further
• creates another discriminating factor that interferes with society's progress towards equality

2. Major criticisms

• The price could decrease as more technologies become available to public and more mainstream
• The technology of gene editing can still be used for medicine and not designer babies
• The market of reproductive technology will make it hard to prevent designer babies

3. Select key support and rebuttal points

• high cost to technology of designer babies: the price could decrease before the technology is available to public
• separates upper and lower classes further: ability to cure diseases outweighs the negative societal effects
• designer babies creates another discriminating factor: market of reproductive technology will make it hard to prevent designer babies

4. Topic sentence for each 

• As shown by the high costs of IVF treatment, only the wealthy class will be able to afford the technology of designer babies, and therefore the gap between upper and lower classes will increase. 
• Designer baby children will have unfair advantages that creates an additional discriminating factor, which impedes society's goal towards equality. 
• Technology already exists to prevent genetic diseases, so genetic editing would only serve to enhance and perfect traits which is immoral. 

5. Evidence

• By spending staggering amounts of money, as much as $100,000, picky parents would soon be able to design superior physical, mental and psychological attributes for their babies-to-be
• As reproductive technologies push the envelope of possibilities, they . . . will blur the edges of what is now formally forbidden: cloning, fetal research," Harvard economist Debora L. Spar writes in her book "The Baby Business." 
• Pre-implantation genetic diagnosis, or PGD, one of the biggest scientific advancements, costs $3,000 to $5,000. That's on top of the $10,000-to-$15,000 price for in vitro fertilization.
• Who wouldn't want to give their child every advantage possible in an increasingly competitive world? 
• Even if the cost of this extra genetic screening comes down, the overall procedure is probably going to be out of reach for many Americans, let alone other countries around the world.
• Imagine a scenario at a future Olympics: is it legitimate to have a genetically designed person competing against those who are not? At the moment, it's a bit of luck who has the right body for certain sports. But in the future, those traits could be selected for and groomed from the womb.
• But if we think the gap between the haves and have-nots is large now, just wait until this technology is used to pre-select characteristics for success.
• Genetic modifications of sperm, eggs and early embryos should be strictly off limits. Otherwise, we risk venturing into human experimentation and high-tech eugenics.
• ...argue that any genetic modification of embryos should be verboten. “Otherwise, we risk venturing into human experimentation and high-tech eugenics,” Darnovsky writes in a New York Times op-ed.
• There are safer and more dependable methods for preventing the birth of a child with a severe genetic abnormality than by genetic modification of the germ cells. The use of prenatal screening or pre-implantation embryo diagnosis will suffice in most cases to prevent the birth of a genetically abnormal embryo.
• The greatest danger of a belief in genetic engineering lies in its likely social impact. Eugenics will inevitably be used by those with wealth and power to make others believe that prenatal genetic modification makes people better. 

6.  Map of Argument

• Here is a link to a Coggle of my argument. 

Conclusion (call to action/future of the debate)

• Motivate the audience to speak up and voice there opinions against designer babies. Convince the NIH and FDA that the technology of gene editing is not beneficial to humankind. 
• There are more moral ways to go about improving human life and gene editing is an option that is too risky and has too many negative consequences. 
• ADD MORE!

Oberholster, Venita. "Silhouette." 6 Oct. 2015 via Pixabay. Creative Comons. 

Reflection:
I read Jenny and Addie's Project 3 outlines and both did a really great job developing all of their ideas. After meeting with Mr. Bottai in class I have come up with a new direction I am going to approach my argument with, so this current outline does not really apply to my project any more. I am going to go through this process for my new argument, but It was too much work to completely redo my Project 3 Outline post. The future blog posts will be adapted to my new argument. Some major changes are that I am going to focus on the reproductive technology available currently and how these procedures already allow for some type of "designer baby". Also, this argument will be an evaluative argument of how successful these procedures satisfy the designer baby debate. 

Analyzing My Genre

I have chosen to write Project 3 in an op-ed. This post will analyze the aspects of this genre.

EXAMPLE 1
EXAMPLE 2
EXAMPLE 3
EXAMPLE 4
EXAMPLE 5 

SOCIAL CONTEXT

• Setting- The genre is located in newspapers and there is a specific section in newspapers dedicated to op-eds. 
• Subject- The subject is any current news issue that people have opinions on. 
• Who uses the genre- Authors that want to publish writing pieces that give their opinions on current events.
• When and why- People that are interested in reading about writer's views and opinions on current events will engage in op-eds.

RHETORICAL PATTERNS

• Content to include- Make a single point, tell readers why they should care, include personal voice, include personal connections, acknowledge the other side, offer a solution to a problem. 
• Content to avoid- Do not just give facts, discuss why they matter. Do not include long rebuttals and don't try to cover too much.
• Rhetorical appeals- Logos and pathos are the most important. Facts are included in a way that flows well with the opinions to help support what the writer is saying. Connecting to the audience through word choice, images, and format is very useful in op-eds. 
• Organization- The length varies but on average op-eds should aim to be 750 words, the shorter the better. The introduction is short and to the point and the main point should be at the beginning and only take up a couple sentences. Also, the paragraphs are short, images are used, and a headline is included. 
• Sentence structure- Only active voice should be used when writing an op-ed. Questions, exclamatory sentences, and any unique sentences structures are used to make the op-ed creative, give it style, and include a personal touch. 
• Word choice- Op-eds avoid jargon and overall use simple language. Simple language does not mean boring, it just means that it is easy for the reader to comprehend. Technical terms can be left out and only include simple terms. Humor is used in some op-eds and is definitely a useful technique. 

ANALYZE WHAT PATTERNS REVEAL ABOUT SOICAL CONEXT

• Genre includes... People that read magazines or go online to read the op-ed section. People that engage in newspapers like the New York Times. 
• Genre excludes... People that rely on social media and news shows to obtain information. 
• Role of writers... To engage in the text and be influenced by the opinions expressed. Authors are not trying to persuade, but definitely want people to understand and side with their opinion. 
• Role of readers... Process the information in an op-ed and determine if the argument is good and then build beliefs and opinions based off of it. 
• Values and beliefs of users... Readers believe in free speech and expression. Depending on the newspaper the op-ed is featured in, the readers will have different values and beliefs. Also, depending on which op-eds readers read my reveal different values and beliefs. 
• Most valuable content... Using a personal voice and making personal connections to the audience are. Also, important things to an op-ed are having a short and concise pieces and using short paragraphs within.  
• Least valuable content... If you pose a problem it is best to also provide a solution, and hard facts and evidence are not effective.

Price, Dave. "The Daily News." 2006 via Wikipedia. Creative Commons.

Reflection:
I read Jenny and Addie's posts on Analyzing My Genre. Jenny is writing an editorial, and an editorial has almost the exact same conventions of an op-ed. However, the major difference is that an op-ed can be written by anyone that isn't an established author or working for the specific news company. I will definitely collaborate with Jenny if I run into questions about my genre. Addie is writing a blog post which is a genre I am familiar in due to this class. I was able to give her feedback on her conventions, but mostly I am excited to see how she is able to be creative with this project given her genre. I hope that even with my op-ed I can incorporate creativity. 

Considering Types

There are 5 basis types of public argument and I am going to evaluate 

which ones work best and which ones don't apply to my argument. 

"Creation Day Five." October 2012 via Pixabay.
Creative Commons

My argument would work best with the position argument type. I am elaborating on an already existing pro con debate over designer babies. I will be creating my own argument against designer babies, and this will also be using the refutation type argument. I am focusing on the harm of designer babies and the negative effects. I want to convince people not to use the gene editing technology when it becomes available. 

The evaluative and proposal argument type will not work for my argument because I am not giving a solution for a problem or analyzing an existing solution for a problem. The casual argument would only work if my argument is supporting designer babies because then I could argue why the gene editing technology came about and its impertinence. 

Reflection:
I read Jenny and Addy's My Rhetorical Action Plan and Considering Types blog posts. Both Jenny and Addy included evaluative as one of their argument types. These both work great for their topics, and I feel like a position argument still works the best for my argument. Jenny and Addy also had really great rhetorical plans, but both could improve on narrowing their audience. I know my rhetorical plan is not perfect but it is a good start to begin Project 3. 
Jenny
-Rhetorical Plan
- Considering Types
Addy
-Rhetorical Plan
-Considering Types 

My Rhetorical Action Plan

In this post I will be developing a a rhetorical action plan that involves describing the audience, genre, and responses/actions of argument. 


AUDIENCE

• Knowledge: The audience has a general understanding of designer babies and the pros and cons of the debate. They get there information from other articles posted online on news sites or the New York Times. The audience will have some doubts on the side in favor of designer babies and are looking for better arguments in opposition. 
• Values: The audience wants any kind of technology to be ethical, they want it to be proven to be safe before it the gene editing is tested on humans.
• Standards of Argument: Statistics that outline the costs of the technology and the demographics that are most likely to use it will be the most persuasive. This research will be very easy to understand by the audience.
• Visual Elements: Graphs and charts that depict the evidence mentioned above will be useful visual elements so the audience can understand the argument.
• Purpose: The audience that will be reading my article will have a desire to find arguments against the designer baby debate. I am looking to expand the debate against designer babies and hopefully motivate people to stand up against future legislation. My argument cannot stand alone, but it gives another viewpoint on the subject to help further convince people against designer babies. 

GENRE

1- Op-ed, example 1, example 2

• Function: This genre allows an author not affiliated with the publishing group in an newspaper, magazine, etc. to public a piece that expresses opinions or comments on an issue.
• Setting: Op-eds are found in newspapers.
• Rhetorical Appeals: All the rhetorical strategies can be implemented in an op-ed. Facts, credibility, and emotional language will all enhance an argument.
• Visual Elements: A single picture will be sufficient in an op-ed. 
• Style: I will use an informal and conversational tone to connect with readers and make it seem like I am talking to them on a personal level.

2- Online news article, example 1, example 2

• Function: This genre allows writers and authors to publish articles online and address specific audiences depending on where it is published. 
• Setting: These are found on online sites ranging of news sites to media driven sources like Huffington Post, to academic medical websites. 
• Rhetorical Appeals: All the rhetorical strategies can be implemented in articles. Facts, credibility, and emotional language will all enhance an argument.
• Visual Elements: Both pictures and embedded videos are appropriate for this genre.
• Style: I wil use a formal tone while also incorporating a conversational tone. Articles are more convincing if they are written professional but still need to convey opinions and sound interesting. 

RESPONSES/ACTIONS

• Positive Support- People will agree with the new argument against designer babies, people will see the risks that the technology entails, presenting a new side to the typical con argument raises attention. 
• Negative Rebuttals- People will disagree with the argument, people might not find it convincing, people will find the argument too speculative. 
• Address Rebuttal- If people think the argument is too speculative, I will try and avoid this by presenting lots of facts and analysis to support my opinions. Overall I can make my argument more convincing with evidence. 
• Chain Reaction- By presenting a new side to the argument it will raise attention to the opposition of designer babies. Then, the debate will be geared in a new direction that will raise other new perspectives on the issue. Lastly, more people will get involved in the debate, more people will start to voice there opinions, and as more people get involved they can hopefully make a difference by influencing legislation or actively work to stop research.

Kelsall, Ian. "Compass and map mono."31 March 2006 via Flickr. Creative Commons. 

Analyzing Purpose

In this post I am going to do some deep thinking about what I want the purpose of my own argument to be on the designer baby debate.

Free write on the goal of your argument...

• I want to expand on the idea that only a small sect of Americans will actually have the opportunity to use the gene editing technology whether its for the right (medical) or wrong (choosing traits) purposes. Right now there are huge price tags for IVF alone, and this number will only increase as the option for gene editing goes on the market. The fact that only a small amount of people will have the financial stability to access this specialized technology, will separate and gab between the rich and lower classes even further. This will have negative consequences on creating an society will values on equality because there will be another factor now to differentiate people. I want readers to really look at the idea of designer babies and reconsider if this is the type of society they want. Readers should be fearful  that designer babies will create an elite class that will interfere with America's advances as a whole society in working toward greater equality. It is so easy to accept something due to the great possibilities promised, but I am going to try and tackle proving why the risks outweigh the consequences. 

Plausible reactions/actions...

• People agree with the negative side of designer babies
• People will become afraid of the technology
• People will disagree with the argument
• People will doubt the reality and find the argument too speculative
• Presenting a new side that raises attention 

Not plausible....

• People will completely agree with my position
• People will be able to stop the research on designer babies from happening

Cause and effect chain....

• Reaction: Presenting a new side that raises attention
• Accomplish: Gear the debate in a new direction that will raise new perspectives on the issue
• Then: More people will get involved in the debate, people will voice other new opinions, get the public more involved in effecting legislation, ultimately the public can help promote legislation that will block research

Talk about possible audience and people interested this argument...

The audience that is most likely to engage in my argument are people of middle socioeconomic status and young, new families expecting kids. This is a topic that will not interest older age groups because it has no importance on their lives because gene editing and designer babies will still take a while to fully be available to the public. While forms of designer babies are already available through IVF, this selective process is not changing any DNA, it is just simply choosing the best combination of genes present. Expecting parents are the biggest target because they will be the ones using this technology and if we can't get legislation to stop this technology, we can hopefully influence some parents to not invest in it. 

Blenkinsopp, Des. "Goal, North Moreton." 2012 via Geograph. Creative Commons. 

Analyzing Context

In this post I will be answering question to further understand the context of the argument I will be writing. 

1. What are the key perspectives on the debate that you are studying?
There are two main perspectives for the designer baby debate. First, there are those that are for designer babies and promoting any technology that helps make them a reality. Then, there are those that are against the idea of designer babies and don't want to promote the technology that could possibly make them feasible.

2. What are the major disagreements among these perspectives?
The side that is against designer babies argues that it is immoral to select traits in your child and that you are "playing God." Also, there are many risks involved in gene editing that could have evolutionary consequences and lastly, only the wealthy class can afford this advantage. The side that supports designer babies focuses on the opportunities in treating disease especially genetically inherited ones. The medicinal potential with this technology is huge.

3. What are the possible points of agreement or common ground between the two perspectives?
The two perspectives agree that there is still a lot to research and finalize about gene editing. Some people are just more eager to advance and promote this research than others. The supporters have so acknowledge some of the risks and those against have to consider the possibilities. 

4. What are the ideological differences between the perspectives?
More progressive thinkers are more likely to take sides with the perspective that supports designer babies, and the more conservative type people are more likely to takes sides with the perspective that opposes designer babies. 

5. What specific actions do their perspectives or texts ask their audience to take?
Calls to action on the side against designer babies include not supporting legislation that will help promote research of gene editing and overall speak against the topic in public settings. Calls to action on the side supporting designer babies follows similarly, support legislation that will help continue and progress research of gene editing and educate others to have similar beliefs. Some take a neutral stance and say to overall be educated on both sides and let the facts sway and persuade the public. 

6. What perspective are useful in supporting your own argument about he issue? Why did you choose these?
Perspectives that are against the designer baby issue are going to be more useful in supporting my issue. This is especially true for ones that focus on the affordability of the technology (or lack there of) and the risks like evolutionary consequences. Also, I believe that this technology will start off being used for good reasons like supporting medical discoveries but in the end will be abused for the wrong reasons like parents designing the "perfect' child. 

7. What perspectives do you think will be the biggest threat to your argument, why?
The biggest threat to my argument is the possibility of curing diseases that the technology behind designer babies offer. As a person passionate about science research and curing diseases, this is hard for me to go against also. I just think there are safer ways to go about finding cures, and if it means waiting and decades more of research, I think that is what it best to protect humanity. 

Hagen, Hans. "ConTeXt." 24 May 2015 via Wikipedia. Creative Commons.

Reflection:
I read Jenny and Clay's posts on analyzing context. Jenny approached the context focusing more on the groups involved in the debate. I should look more into the context of the main organizations and people speaking for and against designer babies. Clay's context was very straight forward, but lacked some detail in analyzing the context that both Jenny and I had. Overall, I think I did a good job analyzing the perspectives that surround the designer baby debate and I have narrowed in on a topic to argue that is new and different. 

Reflection on Project 2

In this post I will answer some reflective questions on my process of writing the Project 2 essay.

1. What was specifically revised from one draft to another?
I spent several drafts rewriting my introduction and focusing on the components that make up forecasting in my introduction. Then, when I revised my body paragraphs I focused on creating deeper analysis and  connecting my analysis to my thesis.

2. How did you reconsider your thesis or organization.
I tried to write out the different qualifiers in my thesis in more specific and concrete ways. At one point I did think about the order of my paragraphs and what would make most sense. 

3. What led you to these changes?
People that peer reviewed my essay gave me suggestion of how to change the direction of my introduction to address the proper audience. Also, for the main body paragraphs the peer comments directed me to deepen my analysis. Also, talking to Mr. Bottai helped give me ideas to change and improve in my essay. 

4. How do these changes affect my your credibility as an author?
These changes to do not affect my credibility. Revising and changing my essay are normal parts of essay writing and helps improve my writing. 

5. How will these changes assist your audience in your purpose?
The introduction will explain the importance of understanding how to rhetorically deconstruct and argument, and the better the essay is organized, the more the audience will understand this purpose. 

6. How did you reconsider sentence structure and style?
I tried to incorporate a more energetic tone to my word choice to sound more convincing and engage readers in the essay more. I tried to incorporate punctuation like semicolons and colons also well as varied sentence structures. 

7. How will these changes assist your audience in understanding your purpose?
By writing a clear and well organized essay it will make it easier for the audience to understand the importance of rhetoric. The essay should be easy to read and not take a lot of effort by the reader to understand the purpose.

8. Did you have to reconsider the type of genre you were writing in?
No, I am very familiar with writing formal essays. I did have to work on writing more creatively and taking more risks. The conventions of the genre were a little different than I am used to writing so it gave me more flexibility in my writing style.

9. How does the process of reflection help you reconsider your identity as a writer?
I realized that I have a long revision process and it takes me a while to get a finished product that I am pleased with. I have learned to write to an audience and this shapes a lot of the writing choices I make. 

Cross, Sarah. "Driving Mirror."Oct 2014 via Pixabay. Creative Commons. 

Reflection:
I read Rose and Clay's reflection posts for project 2. I realized that I approached the question about my credibility wrong- I now would say that all of my revisions increased my credibility because all of the changes I made helped convince my audience of my purpose. One similarity between Clay and Rose's revision processes that were different from mine is that their revisions focused more on structural changes than major context changes. I think this is because it took me several tries to understand the assignment and write an essay that met all of the requirements of this project. 

Project 2 Final Publication

Here is my Project 2 essay! The firework below is how I am celebrating finishing this essay :) 

Steeven. "Tybee Island Georgia July 4 Fireworks." 2 Oct. 2006 via Wikipedia. Creative Commons. 

Audience and Genre

In this post I will pose a couple audiences that would be interested in acts of public speech on designer babies. 

1. Biology students interested in genetics- These students are involved in the filed of genetics and most likely are passionate about the topic, so they would love to hear about ongoing research and advancements related to genetics.

• Video/article on a the Biology Major website EXAMPLE
• Article posted on a bulletin in the life sciences building
• link to article/video mailed to the biology newsletter/ mailing feed

2. Prospective parents using IVF- As gene editing and designer babies becomes a reality, parents who are already looking at using IVF will be the first types of clients. They will want to know about the risks and advantages of gene editing. 

• Brochure or flyer in fertility clinics EXAMPLE
• Article in a parenting magazine EXAMPLE
• Link to article on parenting websites about IVF. EXAMPLE 1, EXAMPLE 2 

3. People with hereditable genetic diseases and disorders- People that already suffer from genetic diseases and disorders will be interested in technology that could prevent their kids and future generations from not inheriting the diseases or disorders. 

• Brochure or flyer in doctors offices or clinics that specialize genetic disorders EXAMPLE
• A link to an article on medical websites regarding genetic disorders EXAMPLE 1, EXAMPLE 2

Burillari, Joseph. "Bulletin Board."31 Dec 2001 via Wikipedia. Creative Commons. 

Extended Annotated Bibliography

This post is a link to access an annotated bibliography of sources I have gathered to help answer questions posed in my last post. 

Schwab, Julia. "Library, Book, Shelf." Oct 2014 via Pixabay. Creative Commons. 

Narrowing My Focus

In this post I will choose a couple questions posed in my previous post and discuss why I want to research them further.

1. What U.S. companies are the leaders in genetic editing research?

• This question interests me because it is important to know where the research is coming from and who is doing the research that could lead to genetic editing and designer babies. Knowing the companies and people involved could help find people commenting on the issue and get closer to the source. This could also help narrow down the research once I find the leading company. I can start to find articles that specifically mention these groups and incorporate the research into my public speech act. 

2. Who are some major figures that have made public speech acts on designer babies?

• In the last project I got a taste of a form of public speech, but I would love to look at other genres to give ideas for my own public speech. I am curious if similar ideas and arguments are discussed in different examples. I have a very biased view of successful arguments and need to see a variety of them before I formulate my own. It is important to analyze how people are currently communicating on the topic to understand how I should go about writing my own public speech. 

3. How does the cost of gene editing and designer babies affect the gap between wealthy and poor, why could this technology be an issue for differentiating American's by socioeconomic status?

• This issue was mentioned by one of the sources in the article that I analyzed in for Project 2. This is an issue that is not discussed in the typical for and against arguments for designer babies. I am very interested in looking deeper into the economic aspect of designer babies and how it affects the different societal classes. This will be a great question to explore because there are few opinions and articles published on it so I will be adding something to the subject. 

"Focus." Oct 2012 via Pixabay. Creative Commons. 

Questions About Controversy

In this blog post I will be exploring the topic of designer babies further to gain a greater understanding of the subject. I am going to pose multiple questions that answer who, what, when, where, and how. 

WHO
1. Who are the major groups, companies, or organizations that support designer babies and the research and technology behind them?
2. Who are the major groups, companies, or organizations that are against designer babies and the research and technology behind them?
3. Who are some major figures that are have made public speech acts on designer babies?
4. Who is the audience that wants to learn and know more about designer babies?
5. Who is the audience that would want to engage in public acts of speech about designer babies?

WHAT
1. Is the debate solely pro and con designer babies?
2. Are there other aspects of the technology being debated?
3. Is the use of gene editing to eradicate disease up for debate?
4. What are some commonly held beliefs on the pro side of the debate?
5. What are some commonly held beliefs on the con side of the debate?

WHEN
1. When did the first breakthroughs with gene editing technology happen?
2. When did the idea of gene editing to cure disease first develop?
3. When did the idea of designer babies first develop?
4. When did embryo selection through IVF first take place?
5. When is it predicted that the gene editing technology will be available and safe to use on humans?

WHERE
1. What forms of social media publicize the debates and arguments of designer babies?
2. What genres produce work that talks about the designer baby controversy?
3. What companies are the leaders in genetic editing research?
4. What laborites are making the greatest advancements toward getting the gene editing technology closest to being ready to be used on humans?
5. What areas of the country share beliefs in favor/against designer babies?

HOW
1. What media sources have been responsible for communicating events related to designer babies?
2. Has any organization or group showed full support for designer babies?
3. Are people that use IFV to choose the sex of their baby focused on in debate articles?
4. Do any sources have valid predictions about the reality of designer babies in the future?
5. Are there any scholarly journals or media sources that have touched on designer babies?

Schumann, Tobias. "Who is it." 25 Oct 2011 via Wikipedia Commons. Creative Commons.

Update Draft to Revise

I have been changing my draft around a lot and thought it would be easier to post a new link! If you happen to look at this, any comments and suggestions are greatly appreciated. Thanks :)

Punctuation Part 2

In this post I will look at 3 more types of punctuation and discuss what I learned about them and how I can implement them into my writing to improve my grammar. These three punctuations are apostrophes, quotation marks, and end punctuation.

• apostrophes- Most of the do's and don'ts of using apostrophes are very simple I knew most of them. There was one point that stood out to me because I never knew the exact rule- do not use an apostrophe to for the plural of numbers, letters, abbreviations, and words mentioned as words. When writing out 1920s, there is no apostrophe so I learned something new!

• quotation marks- A lot of the rules for using quotation marks were also already things I was aware of, but it's always good to double check. I know I can implement quotes in my essay to set off words used as words. For example, when I am referencing a specific word from the article I have to set if off with quotation marks.

• end punctuation- End punctuation includes periods, question marks, and exclamation points. I know I will be using periods and question marks in my essay, so I might also consider using an exclamation point to emphasize an energetic or passionate part of the argument. End punctuation is very elementary so this section really isn't necessary for college students to read. 

Cole, Stephens. "Interrobang." 24 Sep. 2008 via Flickr. Creative Commons

Copy for Paragraph Analysis 2

In this post is a link that directs you to a copy of my draft where I analyzed the paragraphs. In each paragraph I looked at the following points:

• focuses on the main point
• develops the main point
• organization
• links ideas
• smooth transitons. 

Here is the link for the Copy for Paragraph Analysis 2. 

Glacial-Overfreeze. "Peace Sign ove Sunset." 1 Mar 2010 via Diviant Art. Creative Commons. 

Revised Conclusion

This posts includes my newly revised conclusion along with an explanation of how I approached my revisions.

1. Original Project 2 draft
2. Project 2 draft with new conclusion.

I approached re-writing my conclusion by looking forward into the future of gene editing and circling back to the metaphor I used comparing designer babies to designing a rhetorical analysis. I am still not pleased with this conclusion because the ideas sound choppy. The main point I tried to convey in my conclusion is Stockton's use of rhetorical strategies in his article is a successful way of conveying his argument. 

Logan. "You've finally reached it!" 23 Aug. 2010 via CommonsHelper.  Public Domain EWikist.

Revised Introduction

In this post I will share my new and improved introduction and explain the changes that I made. 

1. Original Project 2 Draft
2. Project 2 Draft with new introduction

I focused on the including a better hook that will grab the readers attention. Then I explained the context of the article more to give the readers information about how the designer babies because in my original draft I did not include any background information. I did keep the middle sentence because it gives a great summary of the author's argument and my peer revisers agreed with this. Lastly, I tried to include more detailed points in my thesis and I rearranged the statements to create a better organized essay. 

Dombrowski, Quinn. "Hello my name is." 24 Mar. 2010 via Flickr. Creative Commons.

Reflection on Project 2 Draft

First, for the peer review I revised Jenny and Addie's Project 2 drafts. Now I am going to reflect on the comments on my first draft that were provided by Jenny and Addie. 

Thesis...
1.  My thesis was not identifiable by my peer reviewers because my thesis is two sentences. I need to combine my sentences to make the thesis more clear. Also, the terms that I used came across as too vague so I need to list more specific strategies in my thesis. These terms are not ethos, pathos, and logos, but they are still too vague. 

Organization...
2. Each body paragraph has a central theme that I talk about and I stick to the main point well. My peer reviews said I had good evidence and analysis. I think my body paragraphs are well organized especially the topic and concluding sentence, so I have a good starting base before I continue my revisions. 

Rhetorical strategies...
3. I clearly identified and analyzed the rhetorical strategies and situations in my text. I just need to improve my thesis to include these specific terms, and relate them all in my conclusions. For example, instead of writing rhetorical logic I need to say credible sources and statistics. 

Effectiveness of rhetorical strategies...
4. I explained how the rhetorical strategies were used but I can expand on them in certain areas of my essay. I discussed the effects of these strategies have on the intended audience and the effectiveness of the text, but again, I can expand on them in certain areas of my draft. I have a good draft but like any writing I have lots of revisions to make. 

Evidence...
5. I have lots of evidence from the article, the use of specific examples is one of the strongest aspects of my essay. Each of my body paragraphs has at least three quotes from the article. 

Conclusion...
6. My peer reviewers liked how I ended my conclusion by addressing the topic of the article on a broader stance, but I still need to revise the conclusion to answer the "so what?".

Thomas. "School" Oct. 2013 via Pixabay. Creative Commons. 

Punctuation, Part 1

In this post I am going to focus on three forms of punctuation that I could use some help improving in my writing. 

• unnecessary commas- I sometimes place commons between compound element that are not independent clauses, and this section remind me not too. This was the same case for the rule that states not to use a comma after a coordinating conjunction. After reading this section I was surprised that I knew of most of these rules and most of it was a review. I know more about how to properly use commas than I thought. 

• the semicolon- I did not know that you can use a semicolon between items in a series containing internal punctuation. I also learned that is correct to use a semicolon between independent clauses that are linked with a traditional expression. I am usually afraid to use semicolons in my writing because I don't know the proper use but not I feel confident about it. They are a good tool to use to vary sentence structures in writing. 

• the colon- The only form of a colon that I know how to use is when writing a list. I learned that you can also use colons to direct attention to appositives and quotations. However, a colon cannot be used to introduce a list after phrases like "such as" and "including". There are not a lot of application for colons, but they do have their proper place in writing. 

"A smiley-face emoticon" 23 Nov 2013 via Wikipedia. Creative Commons. 

Reflection:

Jenny used a semicolon to connect two independent clauses that were on the same subject. This is a good example of implementing semicolons that I am going to try and replicate in my own draft. 
- Example: "Kristof’s attempts are obvious; he writes in a way that equalizes and groups together the audience with himself."

Jenny's draft also included a colon and I found this very helpful to see how this type of punctuation can be used in our essay. In this case she is using the colon to emphasize a major problem.
- Example: The author includes this unpopular opinion, not to slap today’s teachers in the face, but to address the bigger problem at hand: becoming a teacher is not seen as profitable or desirable.

Reading both drafts made me more aware how it can be difficult not to include extra commas. However, Addie had a well written sentence in her draft that employed commas really well. The commas are used to set off a phrase that provides more information.
- Example: "In her fifth example, Powell discusses the outcomes of one of journalism’s most recognized failures, Rolling Stone’s UVA rape story by Sabrina Erdley, in order to stimulate her audience to feel anger..."